Felix Hates Mangoes
by Super Sheba
Summary: Felix disliked mangoes. No, not disliked; hated, abhorred, despised mangoes. It made very little sense, really. Why would a battle-hardened man be so disgusted by a simple mango?


Author's Note: This story is inspired by a picture of the same name on deviantart by akikodate. It's in her gallery, titled, "Felix Hates Mangoes."

**Felix Hates Mangoes**

Felix disliked mangoes. No, not disliked; hated, abhorred, _despised_ mangoes.

It made very little sense, really. Why would a battle-hardened man be so disgusted by a simple mango? He'd seen blood, broken teeth, and burnt flesh, among other things, and yet the mere site of a mango nauseated him.

However, his friends all knew why Felix was so seemingly traumatized by mangoes. It was a secret that they had promised to take to their graves with him. Jenna had been crossing her fingers, though, so her sworn secrecy had never actually existed. Felix was completely unaware of his sister's treason, however.

It was on a dark and stormy night.

Actually, that's not true. It had really been a warm summer day when the sweet songs of birds had floated through the air, but calling it a dark stormy night is much more dramatic.

So, it was a dark and stormy night. Felix was chopping wood in the rain, fearing for his life. He would like to say that he thought he'd been hit by lightning, but really, Jenna was chasing him in a rage because he had accidentally torn her favorite stuffed animal in half. In hopes of not becoming charred, Felix gathered the firewood and ran towards the house in a frenzy. How was it that his little sister, or, lightning, as he likes to tell it, had so much power over him? It was as though he thought that she/it would attack at any moment.

Felix set down a small pile of logs on the hearth, panting. Running from a vicious enemy with a pile of wood in one's arms was no easy feat, and Felix had been running for quite a while.

However, Jenna, was absolutely furious, and would not let her older brother get away with having torn her favorite plush animal into two pieces. And she was hungry. Hungry for blood. Knowing that her mother would wring her neck if she "accidentally" mortally wounded Felix with her unbridled fire psynergy, however, Jenna decided to knock her cravings down a notch to revenge.

Sneaking into the house noiselessly, Jenna slipped into the kitchen, where on the table, she found a wooden bowl filled to the brim with fresh mangoes. It was perfect. Shoving the mangoes down her shirt, as she was under the delusion that she was not completely flat despite her young age of 12, Jenna walked out of the kitchen, whistling innocently.

Jenna found her brother crouched behind a chair, hiding. Although she wanted to see the fear in his eyes when he realized her extreme anger, Jenna knew she would do more damage by pretending that she was not at all upset.

"Felix?" Jenna called as she crouched down beside the boy who was one year her senior, bumping into his knees in the process.

At the age of 13, Felix was tall and lanky, and his knees stuck out awkwardly from behind the back of the chair, making him an easy target. Jenna could see a bulls-eye painted upon Felix's forehead.

When her mother had told her that having homicidal tendencies was unladylike, Jenna had merely scoffed and walked away. Felix was about to discover the aftermath of Jenna's unladylike tendencies.

"Felix, how come you're hiding behind that chair?" Jenna questioned her brother, hiding the angry fire enveloping her emotions with herself. "Mom's gonna be mad, you know. You're getting the floor all dirty!"

Confused, Felix replied with a question, "Aren't you angry with me because I tore your favorite stuffed animal and ruined it?"

"Me?" Jenna answered her brother sweetly. "Not at all. Besides, that one wasn't my favorite."

An alarm went off in Felix's brain, however, being the loving brother that he was, he decided to throw caution to the wind and trust his sister.

That was the biggest mistake he ever made in his life.

Climbing out from behind the chair, Felix started to make his way towards the door so that he could finish his outside chores.

That was when Jenna pounced.

Tackling her older brother to the ground, Jenna clawed at his hair and began to pull it with all of her might. She was careful to keep her chest from being hit, knowing that the fruit would do her no good if it was bruised and abused before she got the chance to use it.

"Bastard!" Jenna shrieked, beginning to punch her brother's chest as she struggled to maintain control over her brother. "Like HELL that wasn't my favorite stuffed animal! I'll KILL you!"

Felix managed to gain control momentarily and sped out of the house towards his friend Isaac's yard. Surely Jenna would not attack him there. It was obvious that Jenna wanted to impress Isaac.

Too bad her lust for blood was far greater than her desire to impress a boy.

Jenna ran in hot pursuit of her brother, ignoring the mud that was splattering on her legs and shoes as she ran though the small puddles of mud in her mother's garden. Vegetables of different shapes and sizes all began to resemble each other as Jenna moved through the garden and smashed them.

By taking a shortcut through the garden, Jenna caught up to Felix as he hurried towards Isaac's house. Felix was afraid of Jenna's wrath, true, but the thought of being at the end of his mother's fury for the vegetables he'd destroy was far less appealing than being attacked by his sister. Felix heaved a sigh of relief when he was mere feet from Isaac's doorstep.

Mere feet made all the difference in this game of cat and mouse. Felix was the mouse; a three-legged, mentally challenged mouse.

Jenna swore at the top of her lungs as she again tackled her elder brother to the ground, grabbing his hair by its ponytail.

"You ass!" Jenna continued her tirade that had begun when they were still in her living room. "How could you think for one second that I'd ever forgive you? You…!"

Jenna let out a string of curses that would make a sailor blush. If he had not been preoccupied by his sister's abuse, he might've thought to tell their mother on her for using such dirty language. Unfortunately, Felix's thoughts were fixed on avoiding getting a broken nose.

Scuffling, the two rolled in the grass as Felix attempted to block Jenna's blows, using his free arm to keep her punches from hitting him in the face. When this failed to seriously injure Felix, Jenna continued to punch with one hand as she began pulling the fruit from beneath her shirt. What Felix had believed to be Jenna's way of misguided padding was actually her weapon.

Upon seeing the mango being thrown close range at his face, Felix was too surprised to avoid the blow.

"Dammit, Jenna!" Felix yelled as he attempted to open his left eye. "'The hell are you doing? It was just a stuffed animal!"

He could feel it swelling and knew that very soon it would be encircled by a purple bruise.

"'_Just a stuffed animal_?'" Jenna cried as a horrified expression overtook her features.

The gleam in her eyes was that of a homicidal maniac about to kill his victim in an incredibly slow and painful way.

Jenna took another mango from her shirt and roughly shoved it into Felix's mouth, which he had foolishly left gaping after seeing the look on Jenna's face.

"Shut your mouth, you jerk!" Jenna ordered her older brother. "The more you talk, the worse this is going to be. You're already in deep shit, so don't think you're going to gain any points from me for pretty words. That may work on other people, but it sure as hell won't work on me."

Jenna grabbed another mango and struck Felix across the face with it. Felix could feel the blood pooling in his mouth, but he managed to punch Jenna in the nose, eliciting a pained yelp from her. Feeling a bit guilty for hitting Jenna (she was a girl, after all, sister or not), Felix tried to shove her off of him. This did little, however, because as the adrenaline pumped through Jenna's veins, her grip tightened as he tried to free himself from her grasp.

With one mango left to throw, Jenna put all her strength into a final blow as she threw the mango at Felix's face with all her might. The piece of fruit collided with his unharmed eye and nose. His nose cracked under the force of the mango, and pain flooded Felix' senses. Apparently, breaking one's nose was excruciating.

"Son of a…" Felix mumbled before his eye lids slid close and he fell still on the ground.

Tired of being interrupted by all of the commotion outside, Isaac put the letter he was writing onto his desk and strode downstairs in annoyance.

"What in Weyard is going on here?" Isaac asked in an angered voice.

That was when he laid eyes on Jenna, who was atop her brother and covered in sweat.

Backing up a few steps in utter surprise, Isaac began to chuckle, which soon escalated to laughter as he looked at the damage Jenna had done Felix.

"What'd he do to you, Jenna?" Isaac hiccupped as he attempted to stop laughing.

Jenna snorted as she stalked off, dragging Felix's body behind her by the feet.

Only a week later when Felix was again capable of talking would Isaac find out that Jenna had bludgeoned her brother with mangoes because he had accidentally torn one of her stuffed animals. Isaac would never know how or why Felix had even been near one of Jenna's stuffed animals, however, this fact was trivial in comparison to the fact that Felix had been beaten into unconsciousness with mangoes by his very violent younger sister.

Needless to say, Felix never let his sister anywhere near fruit after that incident.

To anyone who was not an eye-witness of Felix's brutal fruit-related beating, it was a dark and stormy night, and it was lightning that kept him in bed for a week. Lightning that just so happened to have arms, legs, and a dangerous temper.


End file.
